Comfort.

Comfort to me, is priceless.

I become uncomfortable very easily. I'm never fully comfortable .. For long anyway. It varies with environment, people, activity.. But if I'm uncomfortable, I shut down. I go into this protective shell (invisible force field) I created for myself when I'm feeling this way. That's my comfort zone and there's only room for me in that shell. In every sense.

Until I'm comfortable. When I'm comfortable.. I'm like 20x the person I am when I'm in my shell.

Depending on environment, people and activity will determine how quickly I can become comfortable. Things/people gotta warm up to me. You ever met someone who after first meeting them you know their life story.. And you were just on your way home from work..? Lmao I'm not one of those people.

People like that are very comfortable around other people, I'm not. I don't know you like that. I give everybody the benefit of the doubt as well as 5 ft space. Don't get too close. People are crazy, I might be crazy.. Shit can get crazy.

Don't get me wrong though, I'm very cordial.. From a distance. I have manners, I don't treat people like scum.. Unless they've proven to be scum. But to be comfortable around everyone I meet? Nah.

Especially as a child. I'm around my friends.. I don't shut up. (Our force fields unite) I'm alone.. I'm quiet. (My force field at work) I'm observant, feeling out the vibes..

With guys? .. If I'm not comfortable with them, they don't get very far .. I don't even like people within 5ft of me so to get close to me on deeper levels.. I have to be comfortable. I won't tell a man how to make me comfortable, you either warm me up or you don't. And guys are very sneaky and sly when they tryna cream ya pie.. Ya feel me? Lol I have a specific way I deal with guys that works perfectly with my protective shell.

Weird though, people seem to be really comfortable around me despite my shell.

As I get older and interact with different types of people .. I've learned how to filter myself .. Only let people know what I want them to know, depending on how comfortable I am with them .. Its not phony or fake, its just a piece of you.. some people aren't deserving of all of you.. Let them prove to be worthy, or atleast inquire more from you. As bad as I want to think everyone is good .. Doesn't mean they use their "good". Some people strive off their "bad" and I'm not with nothing. Malicious and ill intent wishing ass motherfuckers can stay all the way away from me. I don't even entertain that type of mentality.

I feel like life is like a mattress. And when you're fully comfortable, you have the best sleep every night. If the mattress is bullshit and giving you back pains, you can throw it out and get another one. That easy. The same way it's easy to change your life if you're not satisfied. When you're completely satisfied with your life "mattress" your "dreams" are your real life and you sleep great literally.

I wanna sleep great, shit I'm gonna sleep great.

Shit that keep me up at night now will be the reason I sleep great ironically.
Lol life is so funny.

Anyway, I like to be comfortable.
I never get too comfortable.
But comfortable, I like to be nonetheless.

With life I am no where near comfortable i keep readjusting my seat but have no fear, the future is near. Or here.