Blast from the past; Back to reality.

First and foremost, I am really disgusted with myself, I missed my deadline.. Before this month is over, that project will be completed. I owe myself that much. With that being said.. I can continue.

Blast from the past. Lord.
Lol it's always amusing when people you never really associated with, are reaching out to you now. To me anyway, I always think what you want? What made you think of me now? And what was oh so different then? Is it because every time you see me, I'm looking better than the last time? Were you secretly withholding feelings for me and now you just gotta let it out?

Back to reality.
Motives. Everybody got 'em, whether you are affected negatively or positively is ultimately revealed with time.

I always wonder about people who like to wander down memory lane and re connect with some. I mean didn't it end for a reason? And if the terms were bad upon departure why would you even wanna go back there?

I personally don't like looking back. I feel if we've stop speaking, we probably won't ever speak again. It would really be pointless. And I mean seeing you in the street and not acknowledging your presence type of scenario.

"They say people in life are seasons, and everything that happens is for a reason." — Kanye West

The seasons may repeat themselves but the years are always different.

If you were once a season in my life and you left .. You really gone for good. It's nothing personal. But the circle don't get bigger. It's already tight. I'm a very reasonable person, quite loving I might add lol but if I stop fucking with you, it's really your loss. I'm very understanding so for me to not fuck with you, you really not shit. My character analysis don't fail. You won't convince me I'm stupid, like I dont know what I'm talking about. I truly be knowing.

I'm not fond of giving many chances.. Mainly because every time they get it wrong it's just all around draining. I expected the usual, hoped for more and you proved the usual. My thing is, like I said I'm reasonable.. But don't set standards, not meet those same standards you set and think I'm just gonna be okay with it. That's the quickest way to becoming the past...

Lately, I've been getting alot of blast from the past... I guess a few people who feel we have unfinished business. I see it as you didn't finish it then, we certainly aren't finishing it now. And it's weird, I'm a super bitch at the flick of a switch. But if I ever ca(red) about you; it's hard for me to tell you things I know will hurt. And no matter how I try to phrase it.. It will hurt. But my time is so precious, I hate to waste a second but your time ran out. As much as you want to flip that hourglass and do this again, I gotta go. I'm on a different time. Just doesn't work well with you. It doesn't work well with me. Skipping down memory lane gonna make me miss my future plane. I can't do that. I won't do that.

What do you do when your past tryna be your present and future?

It's hard to decipher that, varies on the past. Is it worth it? Did you miss something then, that you see now? Do you like what you see and wonde(red) why you still feel this way after all this time? Do you get tingles and shivers through your body in their presence? If all are yes. Then your past is still very present. You should by all means pursue that, if that door is still open. If its not. Move on.

I wanna change my number again. I need to cut some more strings, I know I'm hard to reach.. But I feel there's still some people lingering that don't belong. And it will be a nice way of saying I don't fuck with you, to those who can no longer reach me. And I really hate my area code.


Back to reality.

If you're in my past, you will remain there.. My present is focused on creating my future.