So when I awoke, I laid there recapping the dream and started my analysis.. I need about an hour of silence in the morning. I don't care who's around. I don't want to talk. I just woke up, I need to think, remember and analyze. Dreams life. Everything. Anyway.. I thought of what the dream was trying to tell me. This is what I got.
My life is my car, I'm not comfortable in my seat; I'm not comfortable with my position in life. The steering wheel is tight and hard to turn when I hold on, but as soon as I let go its loose; I'm afraid if I let go of the wheel (control of my life) I'll lose complete control. But I was holding on too tight.. Cause the road was rocky; the path I'm on isn't smooth and I fear I may lose control if I don't keep a tight grip. Okay cool. I thought about my life more in depth that morning, that dream provided clarity in a weird way..
The car analogy was genius.
I love cars. I want to own 7. One for everyday of the week. Idc if that's unpractical to anyone.. It's not your money I'll be spending. Cars are beautiful I love the exterior as much as the interior. I'm the friend that has to explain to my friends how to spot cars.. They just think they're pretty.. I know how to spot em. I observe and feel out the interior of any car I sit in, I adjust the seat every time.
The feeling of watching how smooth a car rides is a different feeling from being in the car.. Your admiration is caused by the fact you're watching it move from close to far or from afar coming towards you.. Your enjoyment of the moment as you're speeding past time when you're in that driver, passenger seat, shit even from the back seat depending on the passengers with you. That's life. But you will never get to see yourself ride .. You will always see yourself driving, or enjoying your ride if you choose to allow someone else to drive your life car. So whenever people tell you about yourself, they're telling you the ride.. How smooth or unstable your driving is, how you glide, or speed past life is seen by those who aren't in the car with you. Even if you're not driving, it's your car. From afar you can't identity the driver nor the passengers.
Be careful you let in your car, and be extra careful with who you let drive if you choose not to drive for yourself, sometimes we need a break.. We can either pull over and rest or let someone take the wheel for a bit.. You should be able to actually rest if you're not at the wheel.. if you can't rest, you have the wrong driver. If you can't trust that who you chose to drive your car while you rest on your trip won't crash your car.. pull over. Kick them out. Or put them in the back seat.
That's what the backseat is for .. pure enjoyment of the drive. The driver is in control and the passenger is there assisting by staying alert, playing with the radio and just keeping the driver company.. until you switch to allow the driver to rest. after all you're in their car. You can't let someone drive your car for too long though, they'll begin to think its theirs. Who you allow in your car is very crucial. As I stated above, the people outside the car no matter what you think of your drive.. Will never know your drive from the inside. Only how smooth you ride down this road of life. So who you're riding with at some point will have to ride for you. Can they do it? Can you trust any of the passengers (no kids included in this analysis) to drive your car if you become ti(red) or sick or unstable that you can't drive, because you can't stop. Someone has to take over. And depending on where on the road of life you're on.. You'll have nobody but your passengers. Can you trust them? If not. Drop them where they need to be and keep it moving. There's no free rides and you can't allow anyone to drive your life into a brick wall.
You also can't allow people to tell you how to drive. You know where you're going, you know the speed you need to be steady at so you can make it to your destination in one piece. Everyone has their own car, different body, motors, interior, exterior, etc. You have to drive your car accordingly. You can't expect a Volvo to hit Bugatti speed. You gotta get a good grip of your car, once you build it. You can always obtain a new car when you're ready, either way you have to drive it accordingly. I can't stress that enough. The reason we have a car is because we're going somewhere and we have to get there, by any means.. We have to reach our destination.. If you crash your car or allow someone to crash it for you, you either die in the crash or spend a tremendous amount of time trying to get back on the road .. You must avoid crashes at all cost. If the crash doesn't kill you, it delays you. Either way you're fucked. You don't want to be fucked that way, I'm sure of it.
Avoiding crashes is very easy if you know how to drive and know where you're going, people think they know how to drive, but they learned how to drive by watching other people drive, never really driving themselves until its time to go; so they keep looking over at other cars and how they move and when they can get a glimpse of how the driver on their left side drives they imitate it. Often end up crashing because instead of the road, their eyes were focused on the next car.
* Granted, sometimes you get hit by other drivers, but the impact of the other car is determined by how you were moving. You might get into a few accidents on the road of life, but how you bounce back from that will be ultimately on you, even if the accident wasn't your fault.
Keep your eyes on the road, aware of the signs ahead and ensure that your trust is well rested on the passengers with you. Never let anyone borrow your car. You should be in your car at all times. Always aware of where you're at and where you're going even if you doze off for a few. You're still on that ride. After all it's your ride. Your life.
I don't mind being in the back seat, of others cars.. Unless I feel I'm better in the passenger seat, I'd never steer you wrong, I'll be alert and aware of signs you may miss and my music taste is amazing of course. Lol I don't always feel the need to sit up front but where I see fit, I'll sit up front. Especially if its empty or your passenger isn't as valuable so you move me up front. I'll never ask to sit up front if you don't want me there and the seat is filled. I don't tell people how to arrange seats in their car. You know your role in one's life by how they seat you in their car, the passenger seat the best seat besides the driver. You share the same view, you're both of help to get to the destination. The back seat isn't bad because you're still in the car, but your view a little different. Your role is good company and if needed, assistance to drive. If the driver of a car I'm in or any of the passengers rub me the wrong way at anytime I'll get out. I don't have to be here, I'm here for the ride.. A ride I'm asked to be apart of or we just happened to be heading to the same place, down the same road. But at any moment it can change, I have my own car.. My own passengers to attend to as well. I won't take the ride if I know I'm not wanted, if I know I'm not trusted to take the wheel, if I know I don't want to take the wheel. I won't be uncomfortable on any ride, in any seat. I'll always try to get comfortable. If not, I get a new car or I get out depending if I'm the driver or the passenger in the scenario.
I will always drive my own car. I trust my passengers, but I like to be in control of everything pertaining to me.. My car is most definitely one of them. Even when I'm resting I feel I can't completely rest until I get to my destination, I have a few .. I can rest when I get there before I head to the other destinations on the list. But I am learning how not to grip so tightly, I'm learning how to truly keep calm and find a balance. Focused but at ease. I appear that way on the outside, I get complimented on my drive all the time. But inside I'm chaotic. I'm tryna find the balance while maintaining my speed and smooth turns when I hit corners. I make it look easy, apparently. But I got this ..
I'm learning through driving, I'm getting better and quicker every day. Can't ask someone to drive because I'm sca(red) of the hills ahead.. Only when I truly need to, I mean trulyyyyy need will I ask someone to drive. And that'll be just to recharge and get back to the mission. But trust, anyone I allow to drive won't crash because they value my life as much as theirs .. They wouldn't even be in my car, I don't need gas money, my car doesn't need much gas. Hybrid baby ;) Lol I just need to know you down for the ride.. Not dying to ride. Certain places we may pass, Sticking your head out the sun roof, screaming at the top of your lungs. No. You're really here for the ride. If my car break down you can help fix a flat.. If my vision gets blurry and I miss a sign, you caught it. I doze off, you willing and ready to take over cause you know where we're going and you know stopping not apart of the plan.
The ride is really all we have, once we get to our destination, it's over. We spend more time traveling to it than we do actually there, depending on where you're going and how long you plan to be there. You have to make your ride enjoyable.. You have to be in good company. You have to make it to your destination, if not the ride was a waste of time.
We don't waste time over here. You might put the pedal to the metal when you get excited about your destination but remember to know when to slow it down, and pick up speed again.. And whatever you do, don't put your car in park until you're in the parking lot of your destination.
Cues The Ride by Drake feat. The weeknd.
No comments:
Post a Comment