Late night thoughts.

Will I ever get ti(red) of writing?

Like asking will I ever get ti(red) of thinking .. Probably not.

I have this thing where I truly feel I'm gonna have Alzheimer's disease and I want everything to be recorded. I pray I don't. If I do, I can read my words with different eyes.. Finally free of my self-conscious thoughts, and actually see myself the way a stranger who reads my words do.

In the event I don't. May the youth and even the elderly use my words to ignite a fire inside them, or to come out with several realizations within themselves after reading anything I've ever written. Whether its a blog post, my poems, short stories, thoughts...
.. my ramblations, which is really everything I write. I'm always rambling. Only after I'm done do I really see the gems I plugged in my words. And I wouldn't have it any other way. It's pure and raw. And I don't excuse myself. No one has to read anything I write, but if you do .. I pray you take something more than a revised view of me. Hope that my vague like depth of thinking inspires deep thoughts of your own.

As long as I can pick up a pen or type words I will always write how I feel, what I'm thinking .. Recap events, plot grand plans. I love that even long after I'm gone, even if I go forgotten .. Which I highly doubt. My words will keep me alive. My words will linger in your thoughts and my spirit will be as present as the reader. For that's forever. To be relevant and thought of long after your bones disintegrated in your coffin.. And that's all I really want. In the afterlife I'll feel my existence wasn't a complete waste no matter what I've accomplished by then. Because who cares about your accomplishments when you're dead and gone.. You spend more time dead than alive. If you think about it. And the legacy you leave behind isn't always what you would imagine it to be, depending on the life you lived.

People can misconstrue your actions and accomplishments/failures but your words are printed by you.. That can't be taken away from you. Sure it may be taken out of context, it might offend.. It might inspire. As long as it provokes something. You've done great. Atleast I think so.

All I ever want out of this life, is successful bliss .. And as I endure this, make it my own and make it last.. Won't be long til I'm in a position where I can help others find successful bliss as well; we all deserve to be happy and living as such .. I just want to help in anyway I can without seeming overbearing, a know it all or too perfect .. This saint with her sinner stripes accepts her flaws.. As we all should. Relaying messages I find useful and motivating to those who don't know, those who could use a pick me up and those who need reminders. So easy to forget. So easy to get distracted by life's crazy charades. There's a bigger picture. You might be too low to see the view .. Or your angle isn't right. Either way, the bigger picture is what matters.. And if you don't like the picture you're viewing. Feel free to paint a new one..

Feeling. And freedom.
To feel and be free to feel is truly great.
That's why I write. I feel free when I'm writing. I can better assess situations and emotions when I write. The feeling I feel inside when I go off on paper is so liberating, and no one walking on earth can take that from me.
Bless the first amendment.

We all feel. And if my words can help you gain insight to your feelings and advance/expand your thought process, I'm truly content. I have so many passions, each and every one has stemmed from writing. Writing things down, jotting things in my notes app, keeping journals (many unsuccessfully RiP..) blogging, tweeting, texting even. Just seeing my thoughts unravel on paper/screen helps me put so much into perspective.
Really one of my favorite outlets.

Another is playing therapist.. And I am able to do that because I write. My extensive vocabulary and advanced level of comprehension, allows me to word things so well.. I understand without judging, I provide insight without imposing my own views on to you.. I can express concerns without belittling your character or bashing your choice in judgment or action. I am able to step outside of myself and kinda become one with you.. Even if for the moment.

Because writing has allowed me to get so in tuned with myself.. I can help those who haven't gotten there .. Get there, without writing.

Everyone isn't as fond of writing as I am, I accept it.

But everyone is fond of understanding. I do it so well...

And I thank literature, for touching my soul time and time again.. And sparking that insatiable urge to write. And I'll continue to write..
And share when the time calls for it.