so .. i was just finishing up some work i need to finish for school, and i started thinking bout my life, and where it was and where it's headed. it's weird because as i was younger, i always claimed i would never change. i felt if you changed you were fake, of course i was blissfully ignorant. but as i got older and wiser, i opened up my eyes. i realized if you didn't change, you would end up NOWHERE, and fast. i now know change is inevitable and depending how you embrace the change, determines how your life turns out. i'm fully aware that every decision i make in my life is ultimately on me, and no one else. to blame others for my choices is childish and i'm quite grown. [ well in my mind anyway ] god willing, i'll be off to college in the fall, Herkimer County .. to study psychology. i say god willing cause who knows what might happen. but as i see my friends, i notice how different we are becoming, and it doesn't bother me, because we are all finding ourselves, we're becoming adults, and if i happen to lose some friends in that journey, i will take a loss and hold on to dear memories, although there are some friends i kno' will last me a lifetime and for that i am eternally grateful. i wonder where my life will be in 5-10 years .. will it be like anything i planned ? i sure hope so ... it's funny because as i look at my life now, when i was younger i never imagined it how it is now, but then i never really thought ahead. i can honestly say, i'm content with the decisions i took in my teenage years and as my birthday approaches [ june 10th ] i will be conside(red) legal [ what is legal anyway ? that's another blog for another day ] and all my childish tendencies will be left behind, i feel there's no room for stupid mistakes, and i kno' i will make 'mistakes, due to the fact no one is perfect. but i will try and learn from each one and avoid the obvious mistakes. i know i'm rambling .. but this is my midnight thoughts.. thought i'd get that off my chest.. well i'm off to get ready .. going out tonight .. and see what the midnight world hold for me ..
til next time,
Crissy.
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